10 signs you're growing up (Oh God, why?)

1)      The headache that panadol and mummy’s kisses can’t cure, black tea with lemon can – Caffeine in any shape or form is your new best friend. Or if you’re allergic to caffeine like I am, decaf will do the trick. When did the milk drinker turn into a hard core bean addict (there’s something not very happy about your life if you’ve given up chocolate)? And “WHERE’S THE COASTER UNDER MY MUG?”

2)      You begin to appreciate home cooked food – You know you wanted pizza everyday of your life when you were a kid and hated Mom/Dad’s cooking unless it was your favourite “sooper special dish”. And now, you’re a lonely critter; cooking and cleaning for yourself. You probably have crazy hours and eat out a carton more often than you’d like to – so, admit it; you miss your Mummy ke haath ka khana. 

3)      Your parents go from inciting “ERMAGAWD waat r u doing” to being your “favourite people” – When your parent goes nuts trying to figure out how to use their smart phone – instead of snapping at them, you sit down and patiently explain to them how it works. You encourage them when they decide to tweet, or join facebook; maybe even convince them start a blog. When they run up to you at the airport and sweep you into their arms – you love that. You’re thinking about what that’ll feel like throughout your entire 12 hour flight. And her Diwali sweets?” OH MAN, I’M NOT SHARING MY FED-EXED DIWALI SWEETS WITH YOUUU.”

4)      You courteously nod at people as you walk past them. Hi-5’s just don’t seem acceptable anymore (unless you’re Mr. Stinson – I saida bang-bang-a-bangity-bang) – There are people at my work place whom I’ve barely ever spoken with and yet, every time they catch my eye, I nod at them with a slight smile. I never understood this gesture as a kid; can’t say I understand it even now but it just seems like the appropriate thing to do.. *smile and wave boys, just smile and wave*

5)      You finally understand what Sean Paul meant in Temperature – And it isn’t just that. You even begin to notice the sexual undertones your favourite children’s shows carried. Brutal was the day someone pointed out that Tom and Jerry were probably sadists. And ouch, right in the childhood.

6)      You actually listen when people talk about their children: The “you’re next” just seems like an acceptable (well, do you have a choice?) thing to say at weddings. Never once had I imagined I’d hear it from a boss, at my workplace. I was laughing at her (a little) for the hell she goes through with her kids during the vacations and she casually pointed out that I’m 20, had only a few more years of child-less freedom and was going to love the contractions. I feel a knot in my throat and denial kicking in. “Did someone say babies? And contractions? Homework? Calculus, AGAIN? OHI’MNOTLISTENINGANYMORE LALALALA.” And boys? She's having the contractions, you're holding her hand - enjoy.

7)      You’re suddenly looking for a stable relationship: Now, I don’t know what it is about turning twenty, but every single person in my vicinity who’s crossed that ‘threshold’ is looking for Mr/Miss FOREEVVAA. It’s a little disturbing, to be honest. These are people who wanted to remain single, forever (and boys have cooooootieeeeeeeeeeeezzzz, ewwww).

8)      You go from “I’m going to buy a diamond bracelet/camera/mad-motorcycle with my first salary” to “I’m going to pay rent, some of my loan, put aside money to invest in a house and buy my parents dinner” – And I don’t even need to delve into that one ‘cause that cheque probably hits your account soon.

9)      Nutrition bars are your indulgent food: No, you know what I mean. Go ahead, pull out that maple syrup bar and give it a bite.. You’ve been waiting all morning to put that on your calorie counter.

10)    Yes, you calorie count: You have at least one app on your phone for fitness and it’s probably a calorie counter. And even if you don't anymore, you did at some point. 

5 out of 10? Hello and welcome to your twenties.
Now, excuse me while I go comment on this girl’s diet on Fitness First. Like, who eats an entire chocolate bar for dinner?